Welcome to the Parents Area

Parents, this area of our website is for you!  First of all, I want to thank you for allowing us to work alongside of you with your teenagers.  What we want to do in the parents section is to post things that will be helpful to you.  This will include letting you know of books that will help you, articles to encourage you and messages and sermons to inspire you.  It is our goal and desire to help to equip you and assist you in the discipling of your teenagers.
 

With YOUth In Mind,

; Pastor Brad

WORLDVIEW

Dear Parents,
Here is wonderful link on the Focus on the Family website.  It talks about developing a Christian worldview in our teenagers.  Just click on the picture of the cow, and a new window will open up.

FREE DEVOTIONAL

Free Devotionals for Families 
Parents now have a clear guide to use as they lead Bible study and worship for their families with teenagers. Richard Ross is providing two studies a week, running from 7th grade to high school graduation. The studies are distributed for free by LifeWay. Parents simply need to register one time at www.heartconnex.org.

School Has Started

Well, the time has come.  Summer is over, and school has started once again for our students.  With that brings the beginning of new dreams and goals for the year, but can also bring new temptations for our students.  One thing that I have said for some time is that this generation of teenagers has to daily face things that no other generation has faced before.  Going right along with that, this generation of parents has to face things that no generation of parents has ever faced before.  Where do you turn and what do you do?  One of the things we are going to try to do through this website is to help you as parents learn how to deal with the things that your teen is facing. 
DRUGS  One thing that is more prevelant now than ever before is the use of drugs in the schools.  That's right.  Some of these things are taking place in school or on the busses.  Let me share with you a conversation I had with one of the girls in our youth group the week before school started.  I asked for and received her permission to use our conversation, while with holding her name.  Here is a copy of that conversation, which has been edited for some clairty and to remove some non-essential parts:
Pastor Brad: have you seen drugs in school
Girl: on a school bus...if that counts
Pastor Brad: yes
Pastor Brad: have you seen someone take or smoke something
Girl: yes
Pastor Brad: what?
Girl: smoke
Pastor Brad: pot?
Girl: probably
Pastor Brad: okay
Pastor Brad: has anyone ever offered you anything or talked about getting you something?
Girl: yes
Pastor Brad: what?
Girl: pot
Pastor Brad: have you ever tried anything
Girl: no
Pastor Brad: (good answer)
Pastor Brad: do you know people who regularly use
Girl: yes
Pastor Brad: how many?
Girl: is this just drugs or alcohol also?
Pastor Brad: just drugs for now
Girl: okay
Girl: umm...3
Pastor Brad: mostly pot, or other stuff
Girl: mostly pot
Pastor Brad: okay
Pastor Brad: do you know or know of anyone who has od'ed?
Girl: let me think
Girl: no
Pastor Brad: if you wanted to (and I know you don't) could you get pot on your first day of school without too much trouble?
Girl: yes most likely
Pastor Brad: if you wanted to, could you get ecstacy in your first week of school?
Girl: with some difficulty
Pastor Brad: but it would be possible
Girl: i guess so, (i really am not sure i don't do drugs)
Pastor Brad: (I know that)
Pastor Brad: okay, thanks........
This is not an isolated case.  This girl is also one of our core teenagers, who has been steadily growing spiritually, and not usually in trouble at school.  I also talked to another girl, a few years younger than this one, and her answers were very similar.
So what can we do about it?  There has been a big push lately for what is termed "Christian Exodus".  What this means is we need to get all the Christians together and get out of the public schools, and only do homeschooling or Christian schooling.  I grew up K-12 in Christian school, and I am greatful for that.  However, if we as Christians pull our Christians kids and teens out of the schools, who will reach those teens?  There is a place for Christian education, and some students need to be in Christian schools.  What we need to focus in on, however, is discipling our teens and training them up in the way of the Lord.  Deuteronomy 6: 7-9 commands us parents to "...teach (God's commands) dilligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, when you rise up.  You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.  You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."  What that is saying is that we as parents need to teach our children the Word of God, teach them to love God, teach them to stand for God in our houses, and when we go out, and at bed time, and in the morning.  The Word of God is to be on our minds at all times, and is to be the foundation of our homes.  Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it."  When it says "in the way he should go", that means to be bringing them up to love the Lord God.  If we do this, our kids can be lights in the public schools.  They can be instruments of God to see many come to know Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and Lord.  And then when it comes to drugs, instead of fear and trepidation about what will happen, we know that our kids will resist, and actually can get others to leave behind that lifestyle and choose Jesus.
Talking to our teens about issues such as drugs, though, is immensly important.  Let them know the physical dangers.  Let them know it is illegal.  But let them know that as Christians, our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, and as such, we should not do anything that would harm or destroy that temple.  The Bible tells us that we are not our own, but we were bought with a price; therefore we are to glorify God in our bodies!
SEX  Please look at the following article that has the Dateline study of teen sexuality attached to it.  However, the same things apply to our teenagers and sex as they do with drugs.  When we teach the teens what the Bible has to say (1 Thess. 4:1-7 is an excellent passage) about sex outside of marriage, and they know and understand and believe that, then when they are faced with it in school, we know that they will most likely make the right decision.  But again, please talk with your teens about sex and the physical dangers, but also that sex outside of the bounds of marriage is sin before God.  Note in Psalm 51 when David was confessing his sin of adultery and murder and lying that he said, "Against You and You alone have I sinned."  We have to teach the teens that it is more than just something we shouldn't do, but that to have sex outside of marriage is sin. 
The battles may seem tough, but together with the Lord's help, we can see our teens not just squeak through high school, but change their high school for God!

Teen Sexuality

One of the concerns of any adult with teenagers around is teen sexuality.  Most of us would like to think that the teens in our house or in our youth group are not sexually active.  Dateline did a survey of 1000 parents and 1000 teenagers about sexuality.  Click on the link for the pdf file (you will need Adobe Acrobat) for the results of this survey.  Notice the difference in what the parents think verses what the teens think.  Some things are astounding.  Also notice that of those who responded, 51% claimed to be Protestant, although I am sure that not all would be saved.  Please use this tool to help you as you talk with your teenagers about sexuality.

Parent and Teen Sexual Survey
This was conducted by Dateline, and is very informative.

Books

• Parenting With Kingdom Purpose by Ken Hemphill and Richard Ross
  
  
• What Every Christian Ought To Know: Essential Truths for Growing Your Faith by Dr. Adrian Rogers

Links

• http://www.richardaross.com Homepage of Dr. Richard Ross, professor at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, founder of the True Love Waits campaign, and the Turning Hearts Tour.
  
  
• http://www.family.org/ Focus on the Family webpage.  Dr. James Dobson shares insight into raising families in today's world.
  
  
• http://www.sbc.net Webpage of the Southern Baptist Convention